If you follow my social media, you may know that I started shooting more film over quarantine. My daughter was born less than two weeks before lockdown, so my life was already in the process of being massively transformed when suddenly the world changed too. I wanted to be intentional in capturing it and I was drawn in by the slow pace of film, by the way it forces you to embrace imperfections. Everything was suddenly moving very slowly and felt very imperfect, so it aligned with who I was in that moment.
Now that photography has returned in full force, parts of me are different. I feel more confident and easy in my work. Going to a photo shoot holds a new layer of joy and pleasure because when I am taking pictures I'm centered in myself. I feel fulfilled and creative and free. My time with my daughter is beautiful and precious, but work now feels like a different kind of gift that I give to myself and get to share with others. Like this sweet family...
I actually first photographed this crew around 3.5 years ago. It was a freezing winter day, New Years Day, to be exact. We expected this photoshoot in early July to have a whole different summery energy. And then the day came and it was windy and chilly and spitting rain off and on. And so, again, we huddled inside between pictures and embraced wild hair and warm snuggles. As I've learned, imperfect is so, so beautiful when you hold it tenderly.
Just to be clear, these pictures were not shot on film. But it is the first session I delivered in my new editing style. Because I have been playing with the look of my images and bringing out more of the qualities I love in film - qualities I have found deep inside myself. And the look of my images (my editing style) has shifted to meet my heart and landed somewhere new.
I am still drawn to bright, vivid colors - deep blues and rich reds and vibrant greens. I still want your skin to look luminous, glowing from within by the light that is you. I still want my work to feel timeless, like a classic film stock, something your grandchildren will see as beautiful truth rather than a fad of the moment. But it's a little softer now, a little wilder, a little deeper, a little less perfect. And I love it with my whole heart.
You can't unstick a photographer from their editing style. You choose them for who they are, but also how their images make you feel. So a change, even one that many people may not consciously notice, feels like a big deal. I talked with my husband about my excitement and my fears around shifting something that is so much a part of who I am and the work I create. He told me "It's natural for you to change and grow as a person and as an artist. You don't need to feel bad or scared about that." (He can be pretty wise sometimes.)
So here it is and here I am. A little more myself with you. And here is this beautiful family, shown the way I see them; changing and growing and beautifully loved. Just as we all should be.